A plea for special Malaysians

It was 15 years ago when we went to visit Mummy in the hospital after she had given birth to her fifth child and only son, my baby brother Idris. I remember how happy my parents were when we arrived that morning, but looking back I realise that there was a hint of concern in both my parents eyes. I later found out that Idris is Down Syndrome and that the concern was because they were worried of how they were going to obtain the best education and access to the best facilities to raise my brother. Idris was also diagnosed as deaf and he also contracted meningitis when he was in the hospital. The doctors gave him two years to live, Alhamdulillah, he has now surpassed that age seven folds over.

There were many, many hurdles along the way and as clichéd as this sounds, my parents could possibly be the best set of parents any child could have, they are patient, strong and completely selfless in raising Idris, yet have never neglected any one of their other four daughters. They are determined to give Idris what he deserves and the best that they can afford, whether it be access to facilities for special children or even attention, support and the love that he needs, and their efforts have never faltered even to this day.

Now, years on, apart from being the love of my life, this young man has been a silent teacher, never intrusive, always present, he has taught me what unconditional love is; he has taught me that people are oblivious to those less fortunate unless it hits closer to home; he has taught me about hypocritical people and how shallow some people can be; he has taught me how important education is in heightening awareness about special children so that, as sad and terrible as this sounds, they are not ostracised by society; he has taught me that some people are completely ungrateful with what they have and should count their blessings more than their misfortunes; he made me realise that he is a very much cherished gift and how lucky we are to have him in our lives.

I know many of you have read so many other stories before this and there are only so many words to describe how truly special my brother is. Idris does not ask for much, but he generously gives so much in return. His smile is worth a thousand calm mornings and when he hugs you, you do get the feeling that you’re the most important person in the world. Don’t get me wrong, my baby brother can be naughty at times and will give you the occasional headache, but I wouldn’t trade anything in the world for the times that he gives me those little bouts of dizziness.

I am grateful and very proud that he is in my life and that same adulation, as well as appreciation is also reserved for my beloved parents and my darling sisters.

I know I have rattled on a tad more than I should, but another reason why I am writing this post is so that I can express how I feel about the lack of education and facilities for special children that are available in Malaysia.

It saddens me to think back on what facilities and education were available for special children, and I’m quite sure that it hasn’t changed much. Idris went to the Kiwanis Down Syndrome Centre, but after the early intervention programme they teach the kids, parents are pretty much alone in finding their next source of educating their children. I do know that there aren’t any free secondary special schools for Down Syndrome kids. Special kids are placed in a ‘special class’ at ‘normal’ schools, but it is a known fact that the teachers are not properly well equipped to teach these special kids and more often then not the kids are pretty much left to their own devices, whereas they need constant attention and coaching. Parents do get frustrated after a while and these special kids don’t really learn anything new or useful. In the end, parents do not think it is worth the time to attend such classes. I do know of one school that caters to older special children but there is a massive fee and many parents can’t afford to fork out an exorbitant amount of money.

Ever since I’ve been here in rainy London, I’ve looked around and realised that there are many things that we can learn from the English. Special kids have free special schools, there are specially educated teachers who know how to meet the varying needs of special children and how to address various situations involving these very special individuals. Parents are provided with a carer and some allowance as the British government recognises and acknowledges that these children need extra attention and that parents need to dedicate a large part of their time and energy on them. There are better resources on literature regarding special children, as well as a better support network for families with special children.

I am not asking for a miracle and that we follow every single thing that the Brits have done, but I plead that the Malaysian government look into this with a new magnifying glass, make changes and implement some plans in the near future. I plead that they make facilities and resources more accessible, to extend and share monetary funds to support the building of new centres as well as the education of teachers, and help families who may need assistance. I plead that they heighten awareness by educating the Malaysian public about the needs of special children and how best we can accommodate them and their families.

Many people want a Malaysia that embraces diversity, let it not stop short from embracing special Malaysians, I believe they have as much right as the next Malaysian to become part of Bangsa Malaysia. I hope people will hear this small voice of mine and hope that changes will be made sooner rather than later. I do not want to dream of a better Malaysia, I want to live it and I am more than willing to help make that change if I have to.